The solstice is near

December 18, 2011

Oh what an amazing morning, blue skies, a carpet frost and the morning sun turning the last few leaves clinging to the oaks to beautiful molten gold…………….  I have been sitting here at my window as I do most morning, watching the dark skies turn to light as the sun bursts over the horizon.  In a few days we will be plunged again into the dark night, the longest night, the darkest night in the calandar between sunset and sunrise.

Its a time to honour this darkness, to reflect and have gratitude for these dark days bereft of light.  To see the beauty in the trees nakedness, empty of their summer fullness, to see the wisdom winter brings in teaching us about the need for withdrawl as an essential part of renewal.

As we honour this darkness we also,  honour the return of the sun as the solstice brings hope to our lands as the planet experiences the first slow turn towards the spring. Let us remember the positive, enriching aspects of winters bleak darkness.  Long walks in the frost, wrapped up to keep the cold away and returning for tea by the crackling flame of an open fire.  Sitting in candle light, reflecting on the year past and like the trees shed their leaves we too can take time to reflect on what no longer serves us in our lives, and let these drop away like a falling leaves.

The darkness acts like a nurturing womb, we are held safe in the darkness whilst we rest and replenish our energies for the coming year and learn to connect to our own inner light.  Our mother earth is holding space deep in the mysteries of the dark loam, the womb of the earth, for in these seeds and bulbs basking in slumber , lay our future hopes and dreams, the promise of life and renewal, a future garden of delights.

Albert Camus wrote  “In the depth of winter I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer”

I shall be celebrating solstice with a dear friend Ali who has organised a circle of light for friends  to make a despacho to honour our new becomings, the darkness  and to give gratitude to the return of the sun…………..

Happy Solstive everyone

garden of delights – recent watercolour




thanks to Lucia for posting this, thought it was something we all need hear

Good vibrations

September 18, 2011

Memories eh, what would we do without them…………  happy, sad, good, bad, this is what they are, part of our journey, our story that brings us to the here and now, our life as it is today.    However, if we haven’t let the more niggling ones die, we can travel back to these times, these feelings in an instant, reliving the emotions, feelings of that time right now in the present.  An adult being, responding like a child,   feeling and behaving as if we are that child with all the fear, anxiety and insecurity,  pushing our energies “vibrations” way of balance and sometimes making important decisions from this unreal place.

A friend sent em this video yesterday in response to my call for sending good vibes over to me, I was feeling rather overwhelmed with issues that had arisen, not knowing which way to turn, nobody could give me the answers, this I had to find out for myself, journey and use my intuition to guide me to what is right.  But it was so nice to know I had friends holding a good space for me, and this “connection” , heart to heart is fundamental to me in my wellbeing.

The vidieo footage did send me right back to 1966, I was 17 and had just become a mother.  Bitter sweet memories for me, guess for  a moment though I did become that 17 year old, with lots of confused feelings, joy and deep sadness but instantly I knew, that although part of my journey,  it is not with me today, I could honour the teenager in me, and know that I wouldnt be who I am today without that experience, I can see it, accept it and move and not be drawn back to those harrowing times and relive it today.  There is no need, like all things, they have their time and space, but we come to a time when they no longer serve us and we need to let them go, let them die and allow space for new seeds to be nurtered and spring forth into full blossom

Tomorrow I start to grow a seed that has been laying dormant, I am starting to train as a transpersonal art therapist, so looking forward to all the gifts that are coming my way !! and will in time share many others.


A vision to be shared

August 23, 2011

coming together…………  its the only way

Thanks for sharing this me Ali

Be Wild, Be free

August 1, 2011

FREEEDOM oil pastel sketch, digitally enhanced



One of my all time favourite women C P Estes,  who seems to write from a place that touches my soul, posted  this poem on facebook this morning,  it sure resonates with me.  It is a  poem about choosing a new life, letting the wild wolf lead you on a new journey…………..

So many of us get stuck with the demons, as we get older we allow the demons to keep us small, never straying from the known.  But there is a time in our lives when the wolves and the demons can beckon us, let the wolves win, let them steel you away, take you to that place of wildness where life looms large, where uncertainty makes us grow and rise to any challenges that comes our way.  We may get tipped off the path, fall now and again, but our wildness and the keen senses of the wolf will keep us alert, alive and full of passion.

The call came to me in my 40’s, thankfully for me I chose the wolf, life turned on its head, I grew beyond measure.  It take scourage to run with the wolves, try it, you will never look back.



My children grown, the old folks safe in the TV room.

I climb onto the sled made of my chest bones, sinew from my guts,

bundles of food and water wrapped in my own scarred belly skin.

All is fastened down with rope made from years

of my long hair taken from my brush.

My wolves bite the air. It is snowing like a dunja slashed.

My wolves nudge, nudge; they know we are going at last.


O my children, look out the window and see

your mother riding over the edge of the world.

O my Mother, O my Father, raise up out of your bandages

and bottles. See me vanish straight into the stinging sun.


But no, my parents rattle and creak in their sleep;

my offspring are busy with where to place noses while kissing. . .


My family so sleeping, they do not hear the traces as they pull

from out the frost, snapping taut, flipping snow shatters.

My lead males rise in their shaggy frocks;

their paws make mice sounds in the snow.

and we are off in a silver spray,

over the edge of the globe,

my mighty ocean of fur and steam,

stealing me for a future time and place.


The plumes of my wolves tails fly us forward

and we ride, we ride, through ponds of stars

that sashay back and forth on their sky ribbons

as my sledge runners divide them.


Now begins a storm of paper sheet—

barrels and barrels of scrip,

reams and reams of white page,

brown bag, envelopes, all these

dropped by mill hands with muscled arms

and rolled-up sleeves

who smile down on us and cry,

“Go on! Go on!”


All the paper I never had.

All the time I never had.

All the flesh and guts of my life

stored here on this sled,

and I have been lucky enough

to be stolen by wolves

for a future time and place.


As one gathers more years, the mind

can be carried off by demons

or stolen by wolves…

and both will inevitably show up.


Choose the wolves.



and, I would say to you too dear souls:

Leaping wolves will ever make life bigger

even though the sledge might veer and tremble as it flies…

whereas squatting demons will ever keep life small…

otherwise they wouldn’t be called demons,

for they do not rise in harness for your ends, but instead

want to force you into harness for their ends.


I know you know the difference.

love and gratitude

July 16, 2011

In my month of ponderings and creating  a new work space I still found time to meditate, have been getting up and going to the park opposite me at around 6.30, and on wet days such as today, my trusty cushion keeps me comfortable whilst seated in my bay window overlooking the park.

Pondering on different books I had been reading recently, it came to me in meditation that I would make a circle of beads, perhaps to use in quieter moments to remind of the wonderful people I have in my life. Each bead comes from my collection of necklaces, earings, bracelets, some broken, all share great sentimental value.

Opening sacred space I sat and snipped the threads allowing all the beads to flow into a bowl. Choosing each one with love I threaded them onto some deep pink silken thread, remembering the people, the occasions they were given and above all the gratitude I felt for having them in my life, blowing in a special prayer for each and every person and everything I have gratitude for in my life………..

I was so enjoying doing this, that I made one for my daughter so that she can sew seeds in each one and use them to make wonderful new growth in her life.

Here is the one I made for myself

Wise words from a very wise lady – Clarissa Pinkola Estes


The way to maintain one’s connection
to the wild
is to ask yourself
what is it that you want.

One of the most important discriminations
we can make in this matter
is the difference between things that beckon to us
and things that call from our souls.

We choose a thing because
it just happened to be beneath
our noses at that moment in time.
It is not necessarily what we want,
but it is interesting,
and the longer we gaze at it,
the more compelling it becomes.

When we are connected
to the instinctual self,
to the soul of the feminine
which is natural and wild,
then instead of looking over
whatever happens to be on display,
we say to ourselves,

“What am I hungry for?”
Without looking at anything outwardly,
we venture inward and ask,
“What do I long for?
What do I wish for now?
What do I crave?
What do I desire?
For what do I yearn?”

It takes spirit,
and soulfulness
and it often means……….
holding out for what one wants.– Dr. Estes

Mother Earth, the Mother Goddess, The sleeping goddess of the Hypogeum in Malta.  An amazing underground temple, the energy there is strong and powerful  and when I read this was the incubation chamber of dreams, this was like the “mother board” where dreams  became reality, I knew today I needed to call her in.    In doing so this image came to me it’s the mother goddess, womb like and giving birth to new beginnings,

click on the image to enlarge

Circle of Stones

February 20, 2011


Written by Judith Duerk

Woman, seeking sense of who she is, of how she wishes to live her daily life, letting its patterns and rhythms express her deepest values.  Woman, today under pressure, faced with the temptation today to live out her life in the realm of the masculine, denying her own needs, mistrusting her fatigue, ignoring the anguish of her own struggle

Her task will be to gain the help and support of her inner masculine side, and to return to the values of the Archetypal feminine as she ground her life in and order and clarity that nurture her.

A woman in this book, gifted with abundant creativity, never certain whether she possesses it, or it possesses her, wrote the following, this just leapt of the page to  me………

“For me the balance between doing and just being is the most important and dangerous question.  IF I am guilted or lured into achieving too much and lose the stillness in my centre, then it takes me a long time to regain it and I do violence to myself or those I love because of fatigue and pressure.

I have had to give up “winning big” because I love my life when I am connected to it.  I hate it when it and I get caught up in competition and deadlines. Then I have an overriding sense of impatience, my foot taps…….. I gulp down my food whole……… I spill coffee when I am pouring and burn myself on the stove…… I rip, and wrench and tear.  There is a violence that takes over every act and shrieks orders at me.

I am finding it takes a lot of time to be a woman, to have an inner feeling of space and breath, a chance to sink into myself……  as long as I take time to light a candle to my life, it remains my life.  But if I hurry into work without that small moment of quiet then I have already lost myself for the rest of the day.  The task for me is to care, daily, for myself and  my life….. to love and to nurture, within myself, moment by moment, the quality of quiet presence, quietly being present in my life, which sanctifies it,  to live as if the candle is alight

The Joyous Body

February 8, 2011

The Joyous Body: Part Three of “The Dangerous Old Woman”

live broadcasts by CPE on Sounds True

“It is the nature of the saplings to quake in the winds; hesitant, learning to hold their own places. But, the older trees, with their years of testing and being tested, they are the ones who, whether in the long stern winds or misty gales, sway the most. Less a bouquet of tentative trembling first-time buds, now much more the leaf-perfumed hips of a hundred wide women dancing—these old ones, regardless of form, sway, by heart, to the music that thunders through them.”
—Clarissa Pinkola Estés, PhD

The Joyous Body – Clarissa Pinkola Estés.

Who is the protector of this Precious Being who is my body?

Who is the one charged with guarding and protecting the Life Spark in this Radiant Being’s eyes?

Who promised to watch over to the best of her ability?

Who promised to overcome the inertia taught by a large part of the over-culture…

that once you are struggling, you must remain so, and only so.

Who is the heroine of this mysterious, often perilous and sometimes triumphant mythical life of mine?

It is me…

and Creator,

and …any stalwart soul

who joins me in love,

who blesses down hard

for the strength and longevity

the very prosperity

of my body, of our bodies….

whomsoever and in whatever shape

or condition, those dear ‘blessing people’

–or I– may be.

Best ever explanation of how to dream courageoulsy, Definitely a must listen to podcast,


Clearing our “blocks”  the part in the unconscious mind that drives us, is so fundamental in this work.  If you want a more “scientific” explanation this is simple to understand, this man, BRUCE LIPTON I think, explains in a way that is so easy to understand.

Now here is a man who knows what he is talking about.  America needs people  like this, people who see the value of our children, all the countries in the world need people like this  !!

The following words are by no other than DAVID LYNCH an award winning director of so many great films.

I take my hat of to you Mr Lynch !!

In today’s world of fear and uncertainty, every child should have one class period a day to dive within himself and experience the field of silence—bliss—the enormous reservoir of energy and intelligence that is deep within all of us. This is the way to save the coming generation.

I have been “diving within” through the Transcendental Meditation technique for over 30 years. It has changed my life, my world. I am not alone. Millions of other people of all ages, religions, and walks of life practice the technique and enjoy incredible benefits.

Someday, hopefully very soon, “diving within” as a preparation for learning and as a tool for developing the creative potential of the mind will be a standard part of every school’s curriculum. The stresses of today’s world are taking an enormous toll on our children right now. There are hundreds of schools, with thousands of students, who are eager to relieve this stress and bring out the full potential of every student by providing this Consciousness-Based education today.

Our Foundation was established to ensure that any child in America who wants to learn and practice the Transcendental Meditation program can do so. The TM program is the most thoroughly researched and widely practiced program in the world for developing the full creative potential of the brain and mind, improving health, reducing stress, and improving academic outcomes. We provide scholarships for students to learn the technique and to receive the complete follow-up program of instruction throughout their student years to ensure they receive the maximum benefits. We also provide scholarships for students who want to attend the growing number of highly successful schools, colleges, and universities founded on this Consciousness-Based approach to education.

I have had the pleasure of meeting many students who are “diving within” and experiencing Consciousness-Based education. These students are all unique individuals, very much themselves. They are amazing, self-sufficient, wide-awake, energetic, blissful, creative, powerfully intelligent and peaceful human beings. Meeting these students, for me, was the proof that Consciousness-Based education is a profoundly good thing for our schools and for our world.

Research and experience document the profound benefits to society as a whole when our children dive within. Individual peace is the unit of world peace. By offering Consciousness-Based education to the coming generation, we can promote a strong foundation for a healthy, harmonious, and peaceful world. For this, the Foundation also supports the establishment of Universities of World Peace that will train the coming generation in a new profession: that of professional peacemaker.

Thank you very much for your interest. And please remember that Consciousness-Based education is not a luxury. For our children who are growing up in a stressful, often frightening, crisis-ridden world, it is a necessity.


The Start of a New Year

January 2, 2011

Beautiful words for the journey ahead

The Journey

by Mary Oliver

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice–
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
“Mend my life!”
each voice cried.
But you didn’t stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do–
determined to save
the only life you could save.